When you start losing yourself for someone else

I don’t know why I am writing this but right now I feel the need to write to myself what I feel. I am in an early stage of our relationship and I guess saying things on face is a bit difficult for me. So, I thought of writing to myself. I never knew he will become as important as he have become to me. In just few months, I am so much into him that sometimes I feel scared about the fact of losing him. Yes, this is insane and quite stupid but I just feel this way and I can’t resist it. Love is a very strong word and it carries so much with itself that sometimes I feel burdened with it. But trust me he make it feel like a feather, soft and light. He has calmed my life, he has sorted the chaos I used to be, he has piled up that stack of mess I used to be; In short, he made many things easy.

But sometimes, I feel insecure not about him but about the situation. You never know what next moment would bring to you. I don’t know why I feel this, I have never been this insecure and fragile. At one side where his presence give me an immense feeling of being strong somewhere deep down I feel weak. I had never been so weak before, I used to be a strong girl with firm ideas but with the flow I have been changed. I want him to strengthen me, to become my power, to be with me to empower me but somehow I am drawn back and the fact that I am becoming weak for him is killing me. May be I am kinda blaming him for everything but I am in such state of mind where things are gradually becoming hard for me and I am losing it all.

I always had a habit to keep control over situation but right now I have no control over anything. Neither my situation nor my mind, I am feeling like I have lost myself in order to get him. All I feel now is frustration and anxiety which has brought a storm in my mind and my heart is sinking inside the ocean of sadness. And I am not liking this, I was never like this. I want to be the same girl again who never believed in giving up and kept moving despite being in worst. I wish I could again turn myself into what I used to be but I am not able to do so.

I am losing it all and I want to save myself before I end up losing my identity in my own eyes. Yes, he is important but what is the point of losing yourself for someone else? If I can’t be myself and love myself, how would I love him? I really want to change things about myself, I want to get back to the person I used to be but it is difficult. 

Sometime soon, I will make things right, I will turn my fears and insecurities into my strength. He is my strength, he never intended to make me weak but my own mind did this. I will get back to what I used to be, time is all I need right now. 

 

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I know there must be many people like me, those who feel restless because they have been strong for long and when they get someone who pamper them they start thinking that he/she made you weak. They didn’t make you weak, you, yourself did. The problem is you started expecting things much more than you showed them. They started loving you for who you used to be, they loved the person who expects less and deserve much more. And you know what, expectations always make you greedy, insecure and emotionally unstable as a person. If you want to be happy, you need to bring the old you back and by old you, I mean to say the happy, mature and practical person in you not this stubborn child.

Yes, everyone loves to be pampered but that doesn’t mean to destroy yourself. You need to calm your mind and clear up the shit. You are the only person who can bring change in your life, so basically YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT YOU HAVE BECOME. Your partner never loved you for being a mess because when you met them you were not like this, you were a sorted and smart person. Your overthinking ruined you. You better sort yourself out first and then think about the things.

I am sure you all can do it. You are stronger than you think you are. Remember the time, when you used to get your things done super smoothly? You are still the same my dear. All you need is a little push to get yourself together and face the situation like a BOSS. I hope you will overcome from these shitty feelings soon and become a better person than ever.

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WISH YOU LUCK. 

TRUST ME, YOU CAN DO IT!

NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE TO HANDLE AND SO DOES YOUR FEELINGS.

YOU BETTER KNOW THAT YOU ARE A PRO AND YOU CAN DO IT.

STAY HAPPY! STAY BLESSED! LOVE YOURSELF!

The power of ‘SHE’ ♡ – Happy women’s day ♡

She is a little messed up,

She is a bit complicated.

She is a precious gem,

She is a generous soul.

She was born as a daughter,

She became sister.

She had been a best friend,

She turns into a soul mate.

She grew her child in her womb,

She finally gave birth to another precious soul.

She raised her child as a best mother,

She gave her whole life to others.

She who was born as a girl is now a woman.

Happy ‘us’ day to all the ladies out there.

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Happy women’s day to every mother, sister, daughter, wife and a best friend. Shout out to all the women out there who never stepped back from their responsibilities, who always stood up for those whom they loved, who all never seemed broken even when they were, who all believed in themselves when others did not.

You are all brave warriors. I will not call you beautiful because it is something which is understood, I would rather call you courageous, strong-willed, determined, and above all, STRONGER than every person out there.

Keep your head high queens because there is no other person like you. ♡

The Love Letter Project- Write a Letter and Change a Life ♥

Using internet is too mainstream, daily we come across many things on the internet, many websites, my articles, many letters, many stories and many people. Everyone has their own stories and almost everyone is suffering in their lives, but they prefer not to show it to the world, to others because those who care can understand themselves and those who don’t will either make fun of it or don’t even think about it. Pains and sufferings are the part of the world and human life, we never get rid of pain, but we ultimately learn to live with it, we get used to it, we start keeping it out of our usual life, and this is what we call “Spirit to live life”.

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I came across a very beautiful initiative by a team of six ladies, Fiona McGlynn, Christine Nguyen, Quynh B. Le, Priscilla Correa, Jamie Smith and Ivy Chan, few days back i.e. The Love Letter Project. This website posts a collection of letters that are written to help people to overcome the problems of their lives. A person can help many others by writing just one letter,to help others overcome life’s greatest challenges.

The Love Letter Project was created in 2013, when the founder, Fiona McGlynn, received a gem of advice: “If you want to be passionate in life, consider the greatest challenge you’ve faced, and help the next person to overcome it.” Fiona decided to draw on her experience with her parent’s divorce and write a children’s book (“i and the Great Divide”) designed to help kids in divorce feel loved and self-expressed. She was so inspired and moved by the experience of connecting with families in divorce that she decided to encourage other people to follow the same piece of advice.

Helping others is not only the greatest pleasure one can have but it is the best possible thing one can do and it surely gives the immense feeling of satisfaction. In fact, I read many letters and I am so sure that if you are in a problem there are many others like you, if you have managed to overcome your fears and problems then I am sure you can help many others. Consider the most difficult situation you have been through and write a letter to share your experience, it is not very difficult to help another person you just need a little courage to share your experience. I, honestly, feel that this is one of the best and beautiful thing I have come across. Write a love letter about a challenge you faced, and you will touch hearts, lift spirits, and show the world that no one is alone.

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Please support them by hosting a letter writing party, writing a letter yourself, and sharing this project in your communities and on social media. I have done my share, I hope you would do the same. 🙂

Please visit http://www.theloveletterproject.ca/ and change a life. ♥